The other day, I delivered a program that just wasn’t my best. It wasn’t due to a lack of preparation or a lack of effort, but I was faced with obstacles with every move I made. I won’t bore you with the details, but my favorite obstacle was leaving a breakout room, and accidently being locked out of my entire meeting. Suffice it to say, it was a clunker.
There were so many unexpected problems, I found myself apologizing often, and excessively. I was supposed to teach this audience how to sell. I was supposed to be the pro. I was supposed to be as close to perfect as I could possibly be. Instead, I felt like I failed them and myself, and I carried the emotions of a defeated warrior. In my mind, the only thing I was teaching this audience was how to fail.
And that’s when my audience stepped up and began teaching me a few things. It started when various comments in the chat room began to appear; they were trying to cheer me up. I was bound and determined to keep reminding my audience how disappointed I was. We can add that little move to the long list of amateur mistakes I was making, because last time I looked, making an audience feel sorry for you can seriously demotivate an audience. That’s when the conversation turned in a beautiful way.
An unmuted participant’s voice entered the conversation saying, “Rob, it’s really not necessary to keep apologizing for these issues; we deal with disappointment every day. Could we spend a moment and talk about how you cope with failure?” Failure? I thought we were talking about selling! But it was a legitimate question, and particularly at that moment, it deserved an honest answer… and so, that’s where the conversation pivoted. I thought to myself, “How do I deal with failure?”
I reminded them (and me,) that stuff happens. It happens to everyone, and not if, but when, it does, it presents a moment to shine. Failure may be an unwelcome guest, but it can’t be feared; it must be faced with courage, and a resolve to fight harder.
I reminded them, (and me,) that whenever we do something that involves risk, we are more vulnerable to the possibility of failure. Rather than hide from it, we need to plan for it. The more contingency plans we have in place, the quicker we can pivot off a failure, and plow forward.
I reminded them, (and me,) that wisdom comes from failure. We all dream of a life without failure, but honestly, how realistic is that? What’s more, how fun would that be? We absolutely learn volumes more from failure than we do from success. How could we not? The lessons are clearer and longer lasting, and those failures contribute to our ability to acquire true wisdom.
So many people, (including me,) are so busy trying to impress people with the perfection of our given tasks that we forget that the best way to impress people is far simpler than that. We need to show people we are human. We need to show people we are humble. We need to show people that we bleed just like they do.
I was supposed to be teaching an audience the power of selling and instead, I was teaching them the power of failure. It seemed the attendees apparently enjoyed the session more than I did. I received multiple comments about how much they liked the information on selling, but many more comments saying they loved the information on failure. The moral of that moment is tailor made for one of my favorite quotes from Robert Louis Stevenson. He wrote:
~ The most beautiful adventures are not those we go to seek. ~
Want to listen to this BLArticle® read by the author? Tune in to “Pocket Sized Pep Talks” and you’ll hear a collection of BLArticles® and interviews updated often! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/pocket-sized-pep-talks/id1497772972
I’ve appeared on the “Small Business Advocate Show” with Jim Blasingame for almost 20 years now, and you’ll find dozens of our conversations on his website. We just sat down last week for a great conversation about selling fundamentals and the strategic use of stories. Here’s a link to over 100 interviews done over the years, including my most recent that explores the myths and techniques involved in closing. https://www.smallbusinessadvocate.com/small-business-experts/rob-jolles-134
We recently posted the final video in a series on delivering amazing online presentations with my friend, Jeremy Webb. We go over some great stuff including:
- How to Select the Best Equipment for Online Presentations
- Pro Tips for Sustaining Interest in Online Presentations
- How to Look Like a Pro!
- Public Speaking Anxiety Tip
- Virtual Office Setup for Online Presentations
You’ll find the whole playlist here:https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLRO7BsBDl6oL-6ZPW3O01x-g5PiR38ljL
I just finished an interview with Jay Izso, on his show, “A New Direction.” We sat down for a little over an hour and went at it! If you’re presenting online, you’ll want to hear this interview. Normally, I sit down for a few minutes… but not with Jay. We go over a LOT of helpful hints here! Here is the direct link to that interview:
I joined @Dan Englander on The Digital Agency Growth Podcast where we talked about transitioning from in-person to teleconference sales. Some topics we covered:
- Why sales is a transferable skill but marketing is domain-centric.
- The important consistencies and differences in teleconference sales.
- Why objections are good.
- Why product knowledge is overrated. (Don’t shoot the messenger!)
- My Three P’s of sales performance.
I was recently interviewed on the “Salesman Podcast,” which was a lot of fun. If you’re looking to Change Minds, check out this podcast: https://www.salesman.org/the-simple-step-by-step-process-to-influence-anyone-with-rob-jolles/
I loved talking about the book, Why People Don’t Believe You on a podcast that I’m sure you’ll like called Onward Nation: https://predictiveroi.com/podcasts/rob-jolles/
After 30+ years as a professional speaker and trainer, one of the most common questions I get is this: “How do we make sure the training sticks?” Take a moment and listen to this podcast; “SalesChats” with John Golden. If you want to know why most training fails, listen up! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KR3dDOlTK7U&list=FLxBXKhqz0xBwbUPMqNthAJA&index=2&t=1293s
Thanks for the great lesson, Rob. Yes, failure is a teaching or learning tool. I had such experiences, such as failed experiments, failed business, etc. Every time I learned the reason or something from it, and applied what I learned, it worked out in various ways. “Wisdom comes from failure.” – absolutely!
Another wonderful article! In sales we actually “fail” more than succeed when attempting to get customers to sign a contract. The best baseball players “fail” 70% of the time to get a hit. And so on.
As you pointed out so well, success is based on the ability to bounce back from, learn from and understand why you “failed” and realize that you will never be close to perfect in selling. Even if you have the “perfect presentation” it still doesn’t mean you will succeed in selling that customer.
The thing I always found that offset failure is hard work.