In sales, it seems the toughest prospects are the ones we know best. Have you ever wondered why? It might be because we think we’re overstepping the lines of friendship. When we know someone well, we never want that friend to question our motives for the friendship.  It’s a troubling feeling if we think that our friends may think we are using that relationship as leverage to sell with.

Given the fact that our friends and family actually want us to succeed, there’s really no logic to that assumption.  So, what’s the holdup?  The answer isn’t contained in the actual conversation you’re looking to have.  The answer is really found in how you transition to the discussion you’re looking to initiate, and how to begin that discussion.

To some extent, I was fortunate; I was taught the answer to this question when I was twenty-one years old selling life insurance.  Like most in that particular industry, I was instructed to bring a list of family and friends to my managers office to target and sell.  I brought the list, but I quietly avoided any attempt to sell them.  Fortunately, my sales numbers were strong, and my manager forgot about following up on that list… that is until I hit my first sales slump. Then, my manager’s memory improved, and we went back to that list.  First, he made an emotional appeal:

“Rob, if you believe in your product, why would you not want to share that with those you care about the most?”

That certainly made sense, but I was still stuck on the thought that friends would question my motives.  My manager then doubled down on that emotional appeal and continued:

“Rob, certain products like insurance need to be sold because most people tend to wait too long to purchase it on their own.  When you’re at a funeral in line to pay your respects to a widow, how would you feel if that widow, on top of that devastating loss, was under financial pressure? What if she said something like this to you: My husband died without life insurance.  Isn’t that what you sell?  How is it that you never spoke to either of us about purchasing it?”

That made even more sense, and yet, I simply rededicated myself to finding new prospects and put that list in a drawer.  Then my manager moved on from the emotional response to a tactical response.  He provided a badly needed transition, from a conversation with a friend to a business conversation with that same friend.  It sounded like this:

“I’d love to find a time we can grab a cup of coffee, or a lunch, and have a conversation about the professional side of what I do. I want to be clear:  The fact that we’re friends is not a reason to enter into a business relationship.  But it’s also not a reason to avoid a conversation about what I do, and how I might help you.”

I tried that approach, but on the heels of that particular statement, I noticed that my friends and family still seemed uncomfortable and confused about what we would be doing in the meeting I was trying to set up.  Because of this, I added a little more to my manager’s tactic and addressed that particular elephant in the room; the clarification of an agenda which sounded something like this:

“When we meet, I’ll want to learn more about what you do, tell you more about what I do, and if see there are any specific challenges, I might be able to assist you with…”

You may be concerned that they will be thinking: “How am I going to get out of this if I don’t want to buy anything?”  Don’t wait for the question, simply keep going:

“… At the end of our meeting, you’ll either find value in what we have talked about, or you won’t.  If you don’t find any value, all I ask is that you feel comfortable telling me so.  I wouldn’t want to take up any more of your time discussing ideas that are of no use to you.  Does that sound fair?

“On the other hand, if you do see value, I ask that you we set a time to meet again so that we can talk further and ultimately create a more detailed proposal customized around any specific needs you may have.”

It’s not enough to understand if you believe in your product or ideas. You have a right and an obligation to talk to your family and friends about it.  You now have a way of doing just that!

What do you get when combine energy, enthusiasm… and great content?  You get a “Pocket Sized Pep Talk!”  Tune in and you’ll hear a collection of BLArticles®, conversations, and interviews that are sure to teach, motivate, inspire, and dare I say, entertain!   https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/pocket-sized-pep-talks/id1497772972

I Zoomed my way to India to speak with Motivational Diaries, and Ashish Janiani.  We spoke for about 30 minutes about sales processes and training for success.

Sales Process To Sales Success || Interview With Robert Jolles – YouTube

If you want to read some “Life Lessons” I was able to share in a recent interview, you’ll find them here:  https://worldclassperformer.com/short-life-lessons-from-robert-jolles/

I had the pleasure of appearing on Robert Miller’s, Follow Your Dream Podcast and thoroughly enjoyed the discussion.  We go way back in this conversation to my first memories of performance… at age four!  I’m sure you’ll enjoy it!  https://follow-your-dream.simplecast.com/episodes/rob-jolles-superstar-salesman

I also mixed it up with a wonderful podcaster, Terry McDougall on her Marketing Mambo show.  As she puts it, we “Cha-cha-chatted!”  If you want to hear sales and marketing go toe-to-toe, you’ll enjoy this show. https://www.buzzsprout.com/1569061/8172686-the-art-of-influence-in-sales-and-marketing-with-rob-jolles

I recently did a podcast with a wonderful, new, and up-and-coming star named Jahmaal Marshall.  His podcast is called, “Listen Then Speak.”  I’ve done a lot of podcasts, but we got into topics I rarely talk about, and I’m quite sure you’ll enjoy the show!  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/listen-then-speak/id1550684472

I’ve appeared on the “Small Business Advocate Show” with Jim Blasingame for almost 20 years now, and you’ll find dozens of our conversations on his website.  We just sat down a few weeks ago for a great conversation about selling fundamentals and the strategic use of stories.  Here’s a link to over 100 interviews done over the years, including my most recent interview that explores our many behaviors we display that are based more on a default mechanism than actual logic. https://www.smallbusinessadvocate.com/small-business-experts/rob-jolles-134

We posted a video series on delivering amazing online presentations with my friend, Jeremy Webb.  We go over some great stuff including:

• How to Select the Best Equipment for Online Presentations
• Pro Tips for Sustaining Interest in Online Presentations
• How to Look Like a Pro!
• Public Speaking Anxiety Tip
• Virtual Office Setup for Online Presentations

You’ll find the whole playlist here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLRO7BsBDl6oL-6ZPW3O01x-g5PiR38ljL

I was recently interviewed on the “Salesman Podcast,” which was a lot of fun. If you’re looking to Change Minds, check out this podcast: https://www.salesman.org/the-simple-step-by-step-process-to-influence-anyone-with-rob-jolles/

I loved talking about the book, Why People Don’t Believe You on a podcast that I’m sure you’ll like called Onward Nation: https://predictiveroi.com/podcasts/rob-jolles/

After 30+ years as a professional speaker and trainer, one of the most common questions I get is this: “How do we make sure the training sticks?”  Take a moment and listen to this podcast; “SalesChats” with John Golden.  If you want to know why most training fails, listen up! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KR3dDOlTK7U&list=FLxBXKhqz0xBwbUPMqNthAJA&index=2&t=1293s