This week, I found myself in jolly old England, only I have to admit, I wasn’t too jolly when I first got here. An hour and a half in the immigration control line at the airport will weaken your jolliness a bit. I was detained by a power hungry immigration officer, not for the lack of a working visa, which I did not need, but for the lack of inquiring about a working visa, which I did not need. This kind of interaction will take a little more jolliness from you. Getting to your hotel room at about 1:00 am will weaken it some more. Still, it’s no excuse to be ugly.
The term “Ugly American” is a term I truly detest. Wikipedia defines it this way:
“A term used to refer to perceptions of arrogant behavior by Americans abroad.”
Having traveled to many different countries over my 30 years of seminar travel, I’ve seen it up close and personal. “We don’t do it that way in the United States,” is usually the mantra that identifies this ugly behavior. I’ve heard it, I’ve seen it, and unfortunately, I’ve lived it.
Strolling into my hotel and stripped of my jolliness, (an interesting irony for a man named Jolles,) I mumbled my way through the usual hotel welcome pleasantries. Just as I was getting ready to break off this smile-fest I inquired about the internet.
“Yes sir. That’s ten pounds a day… per device.”
Per device? That meant I could get email on my laptop, but not on my cell phone. My cell phone was on strict orders, (through its settings menu,) to not roam while on this trip. Per device meant I could not use it even in the hotel – without paying another ten pounds a day. That’s when my jolliness ended, and out came the words I detest:
“We don’t do it that way in the United States,” along with a smirk.
Shame on me. No, we don’t do it that way in the United States. As a matter of fact, half the hotels in the United States don’t even charge for internet services to registered guests. Good for us! Unfortunately, I seemed to have forgotten I wasn’t in the United States. In the United Kingdom, all the hotels charge for internet services… per device. I growled a little, grabbed my key, and marched off like the ugly American I had become.
But this story has a better ending than that. I woke up the next morning feeling jolly again, and thinking straight. This wasn’t my country or my culture, and I had no right treating a man, who was merely repeating company policy, the way I did. I went back to the front desk, found the individual who had been subjected to my rude behavior, and promptly apologized. Fortunately, the individual I had offended barely remembered our encounter. I did, however, and I wanted to make it right.
This little faux pas of mine reminded me that every time we find ourselves not liking something because “we don’t do it that way,” it would be wise to think very carefully about how we react. Just because, “We don’t do it that way,” doesn’t make it wrong. As a matter of fact, we might learn better ways of doing things if we aren’t so quick to pass judgment on the different ways of different cultures.
The ugliest American scenario that Ii have seen was played out by a woman who sat near us in Rome. It was rather surrealistic, we were sitting in a restataunt in Rome, darkness had crept in, spotlights were illuminating part of a nearby ancient Roman aqueduct and the restaurant was playing really bad American country music. I was loving all the variables coming together! In comes this American woman who started saying how terrible the music was and then complaining loudly to the waiter. She made such a scene demanding the music be shut off that she ruined the evening for everybody. I know the people there must have thought Americans were obnoxious!
Rob:
I realize this has nothing to do with the point of your story. However, remind me next time we’re together to show you how to turn on the sharing of the wireless connection on your laptop. That way you only need the one connection and your phone can use your laptop as a wireless hotspot.
– Dave
Well, interesting read again Rob and good for you for trying to make it right. I read your story and remembered my own “ugly American story.” It worked in reverse! As a recent college grad,my grl.friend and I decided to go to the UK. We were treated decently in Engl. and Ire. However, in Scotland, we were denied a previously booked room in a B and B because the owner discovered we were Americans upon arrival and announced “I don’t rent my rooms to Americans, they eat crackers in bed and wash their linens in the sink!” She then sent us to her friend down the street, who only had one room avail. down a long dark hall with no lock on the door. We left. Next we were accused of stealing “jumpers” while shopping…clearly the shop owners could see we had no place to “hide” anything…infuriated by our treatment in Scotland, we decided to head to good ‘ol Ireland a few days early..while on the train, I asked the train conductor to give me his honest impression of “Americans.” “You don’t want to know, but I’ll tell you anyway….I think they are pushy, loud mouth, and like to throw around their money!” Wow! Here we were, two recent college grads, not demonstrating that attitude at all, yet the people we met in Scotland, painted a broad picture of what the typical American was, and treated us “ugly.” Unfortunately, I learned in Ireland that many foreigners get their ideas of what Americans are all about by watching TV. I’m not sure we will ever be able to erase that impression; you know what they say about “first impressions.” I know I don’t have a desire to return to Scotland…So, again, kudos to you Rob for making it right…if you haven’t been to Ireland, I would encourage you to go. Scotland..mmmmm, ..not so much…….
good story, as usual, reminding me of similar incedents in various coutries…say cyprus, for instance!but things do get better as we find we have to deal with them…