Let me begin by saying that I am not much of a golfer. I’ve just never had the time to work on my golfing skills. When business was strong, I had no time to play. When business was not strong, why would I have been out playing golf? But I have played the game, and at times fairly well, and I respect the game.
There is one interesting aspect of golf that used to puzzle me: Why do professional golfers, when they are in competitions, refuse to look at the scoreboard? They can play for four days, meticulously keeping track of every shot they take, and yet they seem totally uninterested in what their fellow competitors are up to. If they do take a peek, it won’t be until the final hole or two. This isn’t just something you’ll find with a quirky player or two. This is something almost all of the great players do.
I played and coached a lot of basketball and I can tell you, I always had a good look at the scoreboard. Based on what I was seeing, I made certain adjustments to counteract what my opponent was doing. After all, I needed my team to be playing strategically. It was important for me to keep track of what our opponent was up to.
It seems that the elite golfers go about things in a completely different manner. To be elite, they have to master the physical game of golf at a level that many of us cannot even comprehend. But that’s only half of what it takes to be an elite golfer: They also have to master the mental side of the game. They have to quiet their emotions, focus completely, and have complete confidence in every swing they take. Does this sound like a mindset you could benefit from?
Think about the last time you had an important sales call with a potential client, or a critical interview you were prepping for. What mindset did you subscribe to? For most, it’s the mindset of a typical competitor: You split your time preparing for what you could and could not control. The “could control” items gave you confidence. These were things like the questions you would ask, the materials you would prepare, and your overall preparation and execution. These types of things gave you confidence because they were 100% within your control.
Here’s the thing: You also unwittingly devoted a great deal of time to the “could not” control items. These were things like what your competition might be up to, or your competition’s overall preparation or execution. You may have even worried about some of the politics that might be behind the client or the job you were attempting to land. I suppose that, on some level, these were all legitimate worries, but these were worries you had absolutely no control over. So how does worrying about your opponent’s performance help your performance? Do you see the genius behind the elite golfer’s mindset now?
Control what you can control; your game, your preparation, your execution. Play the course to the best of your ability, and don’t be distracted by your opponent. You will be able to quiet your emotions and you’ll be able to focus completely on what you are there to do. If you can do that, you will be able to perform at your absolute optimum level. What else can you hope for?
You have zero control over your opponent’s performance. If someone better comes along, who is legitimately better suited for the job, there isn’t anything you can do. As long as you know you gave your very best, you’ll feel okay. If the nephew of the boss gets the job, or the budget wasn’t appropriate to begin with, or the company just doesn’t like ______ (fill in the blank,) why add this to your worries? These things were never in your control to begin with, so there was no use in spending your energy worrying about it.
By playing the course without obsessing about the opponent, you not only improve your ability to quiet your emotions, focus, and perform with confidence, but you also will have the privilege of doing what you do best: You will be able to confidently show how very special you are.
Yup. It’s the old “Bucket Philosophy Of Life”. Gotta stay in Bucket #1.
I’d like to hear more about this “Bucket Philosophy of Life.” I’m not familiar with it, but if Bucket #1 states, “Control what you can control, and don’t obsess on what you can’t control”, I’m a fan. Thanks for the post Paul.
Well said! I spend far too much time worrying about the “can’t control” issues instead of using that energy to focus on the things I can control. What a simple and perceptive approach to the things we all worry about! Thanks Rob!
It sure uncomplicates things, and let you put your preparation and focus where it should be; on YOU. But if it’s so simple, why do so many forget to do this? Perhaps it’s an instinctive behavior, but certainly not a logical one. Thanks for posting Ron.
This really hit home for me. And it was put in a way that a lot of us could benefit from this Rob! Thanks.
You know what’s nice Bo? I can assure you that if you “Play the Course” and focus on just what you have to do, you’ll be a lot more confident. Control is a beautiful thing! Great hearing from you Bo.
Rob – Terrific article! Once again emphasizes discipline, self preparation and focus as keys to success. Thank you.
Isn’t it funny how often we keep circling back to that word you used; discipline? We prepare in a disciplined manner, we focus in a disciplined manner, and we keep from worrying about what we can’t control… in a disciplined manner. Always a pleasure reading your posts Michael.
Rob
Always – like to read your BLArticles which helps to massage the brain. As i was reading the quote below came to my mind.
“Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best you are capable of becoming.” – Coach John Wooden
Thanks Rob, for sharing.
I don’t hear from you often Harry, but when I do, I always learn something. Thank you. Being a fan of the late coach John Wooden, I happen to love that quote. If you have not read his book, “Be Quick, But Don’t Hurry”, you should. It’s a treasure chest of powerful thoughts. Thank YOU for sharing Harry.
Marvelous! The core of the success mindset and the very soul of the artist. Some people call it “flow” or “center of the lotus” or unconscious genius or something like that. Happy news: this state can be cultivated and improved until a practitioner reaches “virtuoso” level. That level of practice in anything is the level of art. You know the game inside and out. You play flawlessly regardless of the circumstances; you even take mistakes and make a new path of it. It happens in the spirt realm big time. This is the realm of the saint–the real center of what faith really is–a force of nature.
Wow. I especially agree with the part about making mistakes and trying to make a new path. It’s not particularly “fun” making mistakes, but as long as we don’t play the role of a victim, and truly learn from it, mistakes are the fuel to discovery, and ultimately wisdom. Thanks so much for posting Edia.
Excellent article. When you focus on the competition, you take away time that could be spent focusing on your talents. When you focus your time and energy on doing what you do best in your way, you eventually reap big rewards. I always enjoy your articles. Thanks for sharing.
Agreed. Focusing on, “what you do best in your way”, significantly reduces stress and allows us to operate in the moment. As a fellow speaker I can only imagine how often you are asked the question I am; “How are you that relaxed in front of an audience?” The answer is keeping our eye out to simply play the course. Thank you so much for posting.
Rob, your main message in this really good BLarticle has a parallel in the phone-related business writing coaching technique I’ve used most often over the years, because it works: plan your phone calls as carefully as you plan your written communications. Have your key message in front of you before you place the call: there’s your message if you reach voice mail. Follow a tight outline that respects the other person’s time. Repeat the key message at the close. It’s amazing the improvement people see in what could otherwise devolve into, “Hi, I was just thinking about our conversation over lunch last week–you know, at the new Italian place? Wasn’t that great?–and my mind has been chewing over some of your comments during that lunch. How was the lasagna, by the way?” Aaaagh!
You would make a great “Xeroid” (Xerox employee)! We never opened our mouth without a process. Part of what you are describing is a well-prepared process for the phone. A process is not intended to be a straightjacket, but instead gives us a path to follow. You have processes for the writing you do, and the help you provide… which I may add I have so much respect for, you are the only developmental editor I will recommend to my clients. Great reading your thought-provoking post!
Rob,
Your approach is great (and, of course, I loved Nancy Breuer’s comments) — and reminds me of what I had to tell myself during a stressful job situation years ago when some junior co-workers made me want to quit the company: “Don’t let others control MY future. Focus on what I do well, continue to improve, be creative in how I add value, race ahead, and leave the naysayers in the dust.” It worked for me.
Thanks for your excellent article and the wisdom of life!