The other day, I was talking to a client about working with her sales team. She casually mentioned that the company’s budget was tight, and unfortunately, the first thing to be cut would be the training in soft skills.
What are soft skills? The term “soft skills” refers to skills such as communication skills, time management, problem solving, working with teams, selling, negotiating, and basically learning how to work well with other people. For the record, the actual definition of soft skills is “learning to interact effectively and harmoniously with other people.”
Sadly, it seems like the term “soft skills” has a PR problem. For instance, what do you think of when you hear the word, “soft?” Webster’s defines the word “soft” as, “demanding little work or effort.” Is it any wonder why the first thing to be cut from a company’s training budget is the training in soft skills? Who would want to fund programs that provide skills that demand little work or effort?
If you look up the word “hard” –softs evil twin, you’ll see it defined as “requiring a great deal of endurance or effort.” So, it seems that “hard skills” are the skills that you can really sink your teeth into. Hard skills refer to such noble tasks such as typing, writing, math, reading and the ability to use software programs.
Let me ask you this simple question: When was the last time you ever heard of someone losing their job, or of someone losing a key client, or of someone being stopped in their life because they couldn’t type well enough, or write fast enough, or know their times table accurately enough, or use the software programs efficiently enough? These are rarely issues that hold us back because if there is a deficiency in any of these areas, there are numerous options to train you and teach you how to correct it.
By contrast, when you hear the words “soft skills,” they appear to be less tangible and harder to quantify, but they are so much more important. As a matter of fact, the more you study what soft skills actually are, the more you’ll understand how crucial they are to someone’s success. That’s why I believe it should insult any rational person’s intelligence to keep throwing the words “soft skills” out at critical, sometimes life altering skills we clearly undervalue.
For close to six years, I’ve been a part of an amazing group called Career Network Ministery. This organization works with thousands of tremendous people who have lost their jobs, and who are working diligently to find their next jobs. These people aren’t struggling because their hard skills failed them. They are struggling because no one ever taught them how to bond fast enough, how to allign with the right people well enough, how to be quiet quickly enough, how to bond with clients effectively enough, or, dare I say, how to sell enough. No one ever taught them the “soft skills” they needed to be successful because there aren’t programs in place to address them.
You don’t find many programs in “soft skills” in schools, and who want want to even advertise a program in something called “soft skills?” So let’s change the name once and for all. I’ve kicked around some names like “people skills,” “success skills” and “survival skills.” But for me, the winner is “performance skills.” Those are two words that add respect and urgency to these vital set of skills.
The next time you hear the words “soft skills,” firmly, but politely, interupt and ask if the person meant “performance skills.” Perhaps today we can begin a movement to eradicate the use of the term “soft skills” once and for all. One by one, we can educate others to see the error in their ways.
The term “performance skills” does justice to a set of skills that will be one of the most important competencies you will ever aquire. My friend, and fellow Berrett-Koehler author, Marilee Adams, recently told me:
Soft skills equals hard cash.
These skills will be pivotal in determining if you get hired, accepted by others, promoted, admired, and respected. Now…. it seems pretty clear that we can all use training in “performance skills,” right?
At the Institute for Excellence in Sales, we get inquiries from sales leaders all the time seeking best resources to help their teams grow. One of the big requests over the past 14 months is how to develop the EQ (emotional intelligence) of their performers. Could be defined as a “soft skill” but a critical one.
Could be defined as “soft skills” if that word existed… but it doesn’t. EQ is a classic “performance skill.” Thanks for the post Fred.
I totally agree! I believe that knowing “how to deal with people” is one, if not, the world most important skill! If you don’t know how to “sell”,”persuade” or “understand” people, how do you want to get your way? It will always put you in the other party’s way. It is not just important for your career but also for you life in general. There will be situations where those perfomrance skill will save yourelf, will get you your way or even will help your family or friends!
Love this article!
Well, I agree with you! Spending my career helping others to communicate more effectively, demeaning these performance skills is not only silly, it’s dangerous. Great hearing from you Matheus. Nice to know that Luxembourg is listening!
Thanks Rob for bringing up a topic that has been in our blind spot for so long that we just overlooked it…and you are right, it is the “soft” part. I like the “Performance Skills”.
What a helpful, right-to-the-point post.
Thanks for the kind words. I had a little trouble writing this one because my anger towards this topic interfered with my ability to write about it! But, we got there. 🙂 I appreciate the post Hussein.
Rob, you might analogize soft skills to air.
Inflating a tire to 50 psi, can lift several thousand pounds of truck
What a great point! Thanks for the analogy, and the post Pat!
Hi Rob. A very good point you have made. I can now add ‘performance skills’ to my list of skills on my CV. I thing it could make an interesting question from interviewers.
Outstanding! I could only hope that an interviewer would ask, “What does that mean?” You could begin your answer with, “It means I can communicate effectively with those around me.” Thanks for the post Ann Marie,
Well said Rob.
Thanks Neil. Always glad to know you’re reading the BLArticle®!
Excellent and informative as always. Performance Skills has much more impact.
Performance Skills has much more impact as words together, and skills applied! Thanks for the post Elyse!
Thanks for the e-mail Rob
Lots to do. Especially in soft and hard skills.
Looking forward to training in performance skills.
You bet Chris. Thanks for the post my friend.
Excellent article! I like the name Performance Skills. It should have been changed to that name long ago. They are the keys to success. I still remember the great training you provided when I first became a trainer. Not only was it effective, it was great fun. Keep up the great work! I love the new name for the skills.
I remember teaching you a few things and learned a few things from you Phyllis when we roamed the halls of Xerox together. I also remember you have excellent performance skills! Thanks so much for the post.
Thanks Rob for the great article with refreshing perspectives. Always need to improve performance skills.
I had a two-day workshop just this week, and was a little sloppy early with my own performance skills… but I got it together. We all need to improve our performance skills, and when we think we don’t, we have a BIG problem. Thanks for the post Hui!
Rob, no question, “Soft Skills” rubs me the wrong way and I couldn’t agree more that the term needs to go. I actually love all of the other terms…. “people skills, success skills, survival skills and Performance Skills”. Anyone of these are huge improvement. I personally really like “Success Skills”.
Lisa and I, as small business owners (5 to 7 employees), have learned over many year’s how much we value employees who work well with others (teamwork), who have a work ethic which demonstrates that they understand that their work is important to our company and our clients, who genuinely like people –which shows up in the way they service our clients, who show up on time and do their work in a way that says that getting the job done is more important than the clock and who take real pride in the work that they do, and that we do, as an company.
I have a very old friend that I recently re-connected with a few weeks ago. His father told him, early in his life, “It’s what you know”. He worked hard, went on to earn a Masters and a PHD. He had a high level job in his field. Life was great and he was living the dream. One day, his boss comes into his office and tells him that he’s done. He spends the next 20 years sending out hundreds of resumes and interview after interview. With his voice cracking on the phone…he says, “I just turned 65 and I’m trying my best to live on my Social Security check.” I hear him choking back the tears, as he continues. “I look back on my life and I just never envisioned I would end up here, nothing to show, no accomplishments to be proud of…my life has meant nothing.” “Now I realize”, he says, …”my father was wrong; it’s never been about what you know…it’s about who you know. All my contacts, the people who really knew me, are gone or haven’t been in my life for years. How did I end up here…”
Add this lesson to the concept of what’s really important for a successful life. Yes, the education, product knowledge, computer skills… very important, but…building real relationships may very well be the most important skill of all.